little feet, big sky

Katie’s observations are confirmed by research – in one Canadian study where carrying was increased throughout the day, (in addition to carrying which occurred during feeding and in response to crying), infants cried and fussed 43% less overall, and 51% less during the evening, and studies at Columbia University with mothers and infants considered at risk of failing to form secure attachments, showed that increased carrying led to increased maternal sensitivity, which resulted in less crying and quicker bonding. – Velcro Baby – The Baby That Clings!

I’m a geek. The classic self-employed, work-from-home (mostly) geek. I didn’t think this would be a clash with parenting too much until I spoke at a conference last year, got bitten by the speaking bug and have spent the last 8 months of pregnancy just a teensy bit depressed that I’ll have to wait at least a year to have the time, patience and brainpower to resume speaking. The spouse knows this and recently sent me this post from Kirrily Robert’s Infotropism via del.icio.us:

Yesterday I attended Web 2.0 Expo SF, an O’Reilly conference at the Moscone Center. In fact I was mostly there to chair a panel on Troll Whispering with three prominent women in the field of Web 2.0 community management: Christy Canida from Instructables, Teresa Nielsen Hayden from Boing Boing, and Amy Muller from Get Satisfaction.

The four of us arranged to meet downstairs in the foyer beforehand.

“I’m easy to spot,” I told them. “I’ve got bright red hair.”

“I’ll be wearing a fuzzy orange and leopard print coat,” said Christy.

“I’ve got a cane,” said Teresa.

“I’m the one with the baby,” said Amy.

I spotted Amy easily; she was, indeed, the one with the baby. Her daughter, Tesla, is 4 months old, and Amy’s been juggling her work as Chief Community Officer at Get Satisfaction with childcare. Her husband, Thor, is supportive and helps look after the kid when necessary; he’s the CEO of Get Satisfaction. Get Satisfaction, by the way, is one of the most clued in Web 2.0 companies around, and a bit of an O’Reilly favourite. They even help O’Reilly with their customer support.

Anyway, it’s a good thing Thor was there yesterday to mind the baby. It turns out that babes in arms are not permitted on the expo floor or in the conference area of Web2Expo. “Sorry ma’am, we can’t allow anyone under eighteen years of age,” is what the security guard told Amy.

Back in the first dotcom boom (and probably still today), company founders and executives were sometimes under 18. I’ve heard stories about them having to get special exemptions to attend or speak at conferences. So I guess I’m not surprised to hear that Web2Expo is an 18+ event. But I can’t find anything on the website that says so. Perhaps it’s in some kind of T&C that I didn’t read, but I don’t think so.

So, Amy Muller, co-founder and Chief Community Officer of a company that really gets the spirit of Web 2.0, and an invited speaker at the conference, had to ask her husband, co-founder and CEO of the company, to hold the baby and hang out down in the lobby while she attended her panel.

I didn’t even think something like this could happen. I mean, sure I’ve seen the mothers with kids in tow or in strollers around the lobby areas at OSCON, but I didn’t think a conference would have a no-children policy. Gah. I know OSCON is out for me this July because it’s within weeks of my supposed due date, but I had thought that next year it would be easy to at least attend a few sessions, if not speak there. Perhaps it was a pipe dream, but I had visions of being there in some capacity with a (hopefully) well-behaved baby in a sling for short periods of time. *sigh*

Every year, I see more and more women (and geek families) at OSCON. I seriously hope O’Reilly gets the message and at least attempts to do something useful about this for the conference-going community. In the meantime, maybe there’s a way to organize a childcare BOF, or some such?

Sometimes, I just like swaggy things – you know, things that are probably not neccessary to get the job done, but make it a hell of a lot more fun/interesting/easy. Like using a small ice cream scoop to make perfect drops of cookie dough. Or a hand blender to puree a soup right in the pot.

That’s how I keep eyeing these nursing tops by . I live in tank tops, especially ones with the built-in shelf “bra”, and I think these would be perfect while nursing.

There’s a little clasp halfway between your breast and shoulder that releases and your breast pokes out from a hole in a second layer. That second layer has a bit of support and the flap in front has a mesh lining for holding nursing pads.

They have a variety of tank tops ($34 -$39), including long tank tops (I like those), a long-sleeved shirt ($44), a knee-length slip dress ($44), and even a tankini 2-pc. swimsuit ($54). Shipping seems reasonable at $5 within the U.S., though they do seem to have a signature-required policy for 4 or more items.

I’ve been looking at birth tubs/pools trying to pick one out and thought I should share my research. There are two main sites as recommended to me by my midwife: waterbirth.org and yourwaterbirth.com.

yourwaterbirth.com seems to mostly sell birth pools and kits and has a wider selection, but waterbirth.org is like the motherlode of waterbirth information, so I’d suggest starting there. The only model that really appealed to me in both price and features on yourwaterbirth.com was the La Bassine ($95). It’s about 100gal, with an inflatable floor and has handles on the inside, which is pretty neat. The downside for me is that it’s made out of PVC which probably has phthalates.

Which is ultimately why I’ll be ordering the birth pool in a box eco ($185, with liner) from waterbirth.org. In the regular size, there’s room for the partner or labor support person, is made from phthalate-free PVC, handles on “top” and on the outside, and has a built-in seat.

As for accessories, waterbirth.org offers a fairly generic accessory kit for $100 that includes an electric air pump, a floating duck thermometer, a “non-toxic, lead-free” hose, a long handled debris net, and an electric drain pump. yourwaterbirth.com offer more customizable kits ranging from $40 (manual air pump) to $195 (electric air pump), and also has kits available for rent.

I have been soooo tired this week. I haven’t gotten much done in the grand scheme of things, but I’m still so tired and sleeping a lot. Well, alright, not quite sleeping, but lying down. I feel like I weigh a ton and dragging that weight around is what’s wearing on me. Bleah-bleah.

And, of course, there’s still so much to do. I have a laundry list a mile long for things to do in the next month before the baby comes. I haven’t even started looking for a pediatrician yet, and that alone has me in a panic, as I’m sure some of the ones I’m considering have rules about only taking new clients they’ve met while still pregnant. I wanted to take an infant CPR course, too. I still haven’t ordered the birth tub, and I should call to set up the diaper service soon.

I guess I should focus on the things I have gotten done already. :-) I have the car seat & stroller, and have tested setting it up in the car so I know how it all works. Have the bassinet set up and ready, have 0-3 & 3-6 months clothing appropriate for the middle of summer ready (not yet washed, though). Have the home birth kit as requested by our midwife, have made arrangements with our doula, and have diapers on hand. Umm.. god, it feels like I have should have more to list in the “Done” section, but I’m drawing a blank right now.

*sigh* Okay. There went the last of my energy for the hour, usefully spent on typing up a blog post. Time to nap. :-)

Since getting The Breastfeeding Cafe the other day and devouring a third of it already, I’ve been looking up more and more about breastfeeding online. Breastfeeding.com has some GREAT resources, I highly encourage you to check it out. There are video clips to watch while pumping or nursing, humor, pictures and video of proper latch-on and positioning, LC help, etc. And one of my favorites pages (on a slummy, gossipy note!) is their breastfeeding celebs pages of who is and isn’t breastfeeding. I’m rather impressed by all the ones that nursed to a year; I’m sure it was no easier for them than it would be for the rest of us.

Gwyneth Paltrow said “I’m not in my pre-pregnancy state. I’m trying not to rush myself. I want my food to be high quality as I’m feeding Apple. I’m not into dieting. Now I’m able to exercise, I’m shrinking back down a little bit. It’s a very slow process.”

Breastfeeding.com – For Moms Only – Breastfeeding Celebrities

Lactation consultant Diane Wiessinger offers the following analogy: take two magnets and hold them far apart. There is no tension between them. This is similar to a detached style of bottle-feeding. Now, stick the magnets together. Again, there is no tension. This represents an attached style of breastfeeding. Now hold the magnets a little distance apart, but don’t let them snap together. There is a huge tension between them. It’s exhausting to keep the magnets at that close-but-not-too-close distance and you’re glad when you’re finally allowed to keep them farther apart. This is what it means to breastfeed like a bottle-feeder, she says. It’s hard work, a kind of martyrdom, not a kind of joy.

Making Breastfeeding Harder

I'm trying to wrap up my last client for work this week. I only have a
little more to do for them and then I'm pretty done with the bulk of
my consulting work until the baby is a few months old. I have some
unpaid side work that will continue, but quietly.

But for now, I have work to do and its sooo hard to get it done. My
concentration is shot, and after an hour or two, I start spacing out.
Or my back starts to hurt. Or I get distracted by all the things on my
"baby to-do" list. Gah. This must be that nesting stuff.

Plus, my home office desk was moved downstairs as a dining table
extension while we had guests, so my desktop computer is reduced to a
glorified file server. My MacBook battery is dead as a doornail, which
means I have to drag the power cable with me everywhere and hell
ensues if I happen to trip over it and disconnect the power. My iPhone
won't hold a charge over 20 hours with minimal use, and my iPod is
officially dead.

So much to do and technology doesn't seem to like me much lately.

The Pregnancy Book by William and Martha Sears is, by far, my favorite book to refer to during pregnancy. It’s broken out by month, and covers what to expect roughly each month. Of course, pregnancy is not textbook, so there’s a lot of wiggle room between what’s covered this month and what I’m experiencing, but it’s close enough. (And the index at the back is quite thorough for looking up something specific when you need it.)

I love that the Sears mentality and “voice” in this book (and their entire library) is so non-judgemental, for a book catering to natural pregnancy. The material is relevant to home, hospital and birth center births, and you get the feeling that they are genuinely after what is best for a healthy mother and baby. Everything is covered in here, from diet and nutrition, to exercise and emotional support. I had really painful leg cramps at night for a while and was able to look it up in the index, read through suggested diet changes and some stretching exercises and haven’t suffered from it since. (The trick is to slowly and gently flex your foot so your toes are pointing at you; something I can even do half asleep now if I feel a cramp coming on!)

Honestly, this book puts “What to Expect…” to shame. If you know someone newly pregnant, give them this book instead. :-)